For everyone who wishes "they were taught to love by a city of dancers here's how it's done: hook em: It's all about that attention-grabbing first line. 'get an abortion.' "All week as I looked at the Drum Circle, waiting for the Flag Ceremony to begin." "The comfort zone— i was about to leave." "This was a matter of life and death." "This one is mine "My fingers twitched. What makes you you: How do you see yourself? Show us how the world should see you. "Who elses identity can really be constructed by the calculus of fragmented memories? Not mine!" 'youre such a hipster.' Its a phrase heard everyday in school hallways across America, and its usage often operates as a conundrum that obscures teenagers perceptions of themselves and who they want." "A puppet hidden, a walkway lonely, a pair. Through blogging and subsequent interactions, i came to embrace my flawed nature, and i inspired others to do the same." "Behind my mask, i am a criminal.
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In an effort to get to know each other a little better before the fall rolls around, several members of report Columbia universitys future class of 2017 uploaded their college application essays into a shared google doc. That google doc, which contains 70 essays that either answer the columbia essay prompt or the common app prompt, was then shared with. And now with you. Columbia's incoming freshman class created a facebook group for all newly accepted students. But you know what? A facebook group doesn't tell you who is an exquisite manifestation of dreams." a facebook group also doesn't leave a whole lotta room for an imagined dialogue between you, oscar Hammerstein ii (class of '19) and Tom Kitt (class of '96) at Sardi's restaurant. A college application essay, though—that will do all the talking for you. So in order to foster a sense of community and shared values, they decided to put theirs all on the internet for each other to read. Not everyone can get into an ivy league, but wouldnt it be great if everyone could? We have culled several of the best lines from all 70 essays to create The. If you simply follow this format and copy and paste your favorite lines, you are 100 guaranteed to get into columbia next year.
Notice, too, how the reader makes the transition from the lessons of childhood to the real focus of her paper in this sentence: Today, however, money management involves knowing. This transition sentence effectively connects the opening narrative to the main point of the essay, her thesis: Proper money management today involves knowing interest rates, balancing checkbooks, paying taxes, estimating my paycheck, and budgeting to make ends meet from month-to-month." This thesis also maps out. By now, most high school seniors planning to attend college in the fall have selected their chosen institute of higher education. Its an exciting time for you, wildcats '13, and you probably have some questions about your student future. Such as, who will I meet? What clubs will I join? What if my roommate only wants to stay in the room eating cold cuts and watching. Will I decide to buy a body pillow from Bed Bath and beyond? (Yes, besides being extremely comfortable body pillows are an excellent way to block you from other people's booger walls).
I learned that there were four quarters in a dollar, and if I bought a non-food item—like a handful of balloons—that I was going to need to come up with six cents for every dollar I spent. I also knew that kool-Aid packets were 25 cents each or that I could save money and get five of them for a dollar. Today, however, money management involves knowing more than which combinations of 10-cent, five-cent, and one-penny candies I can get for a dollar. Proper money management today involves knowing interest rates, balancing checkbooks, paying taxes, estimating my paycheck, and budgeting to make ends meet from month-to-month. In the first line the writer uses a well-known"tion to introduce her topic. The writer follows this attention-grabber with specific examples of earning and spending money. Compare how the specific details of the second example paint a better table picture for the reader about what the writer learned about money as a child, rather than this general statement: As a child, i used math to run a lemonade stand. In the first introduction, report this statement leaves the reader to guess how the writer used math, but in the second introduction we can actually see what the child did and what she learned.
This kind of statement may be referred to as a purpose statement, in which the writer states the topics that will be discussed. However, it is not yet working as a thesis statement because it fails to make an argument or claim about those topics. A thesis statement for this essay would clearly tell the reader what things you will be discussing and what point you will make about them. Now lets look at how the above principles can be incorporated more effectively into an introduction. A more Effective introduction. A penny saved is a penny earned, the well-known" by ben Franklin, is an expression I have never quite understood, because to me it seems that any penny—whether saved or spent—is still earned no matter what is done with. My earliest memories of earning and spending money are when I was ten years old when I would sell Dixie cups of too-sweet lemonade and bags of salty popcorn to the neighborhood kids. From that early age, i learned the importance of money management and the math skills involved.
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I use math to balance my checkbook and to budget my monthly expenses as an adult. When I was a child, i used math to run a lemonade stand. I will be talking more about these things in my paper. In the introduction above, the opening line does not serve to grab the readers attention. Instead, it is dregg a statement of an obvious and mundane fact. The second sentence is also not very specific. A more effective attention grabber may point out a specific, and perhaps surprising, instance when adults use math in their daily lives, in order to show the reader why this is such as important topic to consider.
Next the writer announces her topic by stating, The topic I have chosen to write about Although it is necessary to introduce your specific topic, you want to avoid making generic announcements that reference your assignment. This technique is not as sophisticated and may distract the reader from your larger purpose for writing the essay. Instead, you might try to make the reader see why this is such an important topic to discuss. Finally, this sample introduction is lacking a clear thesis statement. The writer concludes with a vague statement: I will be talking more about these things in my paper.
Below is an example of a thesis with a map. Because drunk driving can result in unnecessary and premature deaths, permanent injury for survivors, and billions of dollars spent on medical expenses, drunk drivers should face stricter penalties for driving under the influence. The underlined words here are the map that show your reader the main points of support you will present in the essay. They also serve to set up the papers arrangement because they tell the order in which you will present these topics. A final note: In constructing an introduction, make sure the introduction clearly reflects the goal or purpose of the assignment and that the thesis presents not only the topic to be discussed but also states a clear position about that topic that you will support.
In shorter papers, the introduction is usually only one or two paragraphs, but it can be several paragraphs in a longer paper. For Longer Papers, although for short essays the introduction is usually just one paragraph, longer argument or research papers may require a more substantial introduction. The first paragraph might consist of just the attention grabber and some narrative about the problem. Then you might have one or more paragraphs that provide background on the main topics of the paper and present the overall argument, concluding with your thesis statement. Below is a sample of an introduction that is less effective because it doesnt apply the principles discussed above. An Ineffective introduction, everyone uses math during their entire lives. Some people use math on the job as adults, and others used math when they were kids. The topic I have chosen to write about for this paper is how i use math in my life both as a child and as an adult.
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In this scenario, your thesis would be the point you are trying blood to make about drunk driving. You might be arguing for better enforcement of existing laws, enactment of stricter penalties, or funding for education about drinking and driving. Whatever the case, your thesis would clearly state the main point your paper is trying to make. Heres an example: Drunk driving laws need to include stricter penalties for those convicted of drinking under the influence of alcohol. Your essay would then go on to support this thesis with the reasons why stricter penalties are needed. In addition to your thesis, your introduction can often include a road map restaurant that explains how you will defend your thesis. This gives the reader a general sense of how you will organize the different points that follow throughout the essay. Sometimes the map is incorporated right into the thesis statement, and sometimes it is a separate sentence.
We might say, for example: Michelles story is not isolated. Each year xx (number) of lives are lost due to drunk-driving accidents. You could follow this with a short discussion of how serious the problem is and why the reader should care about this problem. This effectively moves the reader from the story about Michelle to your real topic, which might be the need for stricter penalties for drinking and driving. Finally, the introduction must conclude with a clear statement of the overall point you want to make in the paper. This is called your thesis statement. It is the narrowest part of your inverted pyramid, and it states exactly what your essay will philosophy be arguing.
focusing on this topic and makes the transition to the main point of your paper. For this reason, this is sometimes called the transitional part of the introduction. In the example above, the anecdote about Michelle might capture the readers attention, but the essay is not really about Michelle. The attention grabber might get the reader thinking about how drunk driving can destroy peoples lives, but it doesnt introduce the topic of the need for stricter drunk driving penalties (or whatever the real focus of the paper might be). Therefore, you need to bridge the gap between your attention-grabber and your thesis with some transitional discussion. In this part of your introduction, you narrow your focus of the topic and explain why the attention-grabber is relevant to the specific area you will be discussing. You should introduce your specific topic and provide any necessary background information that the reader would need in order to understand the problem that you are presenting in the paper. You can also define any key terms the reader might not know. Continuing with the example above, we might move from the narrative about Michelle to a short discussion of the scope of the problem of drunk drivers.
For example, although it may be tempting to begin your essay with a dictionary definition, this technique is stale because it has been widely overused. Instead, you might try one of the following techniques: Offer a surprising statistic that conveys something about the problem to be addressed in the paper. Perhaps you can find an interesting" that nicely sums up your argument. Use rhetorical questions that place your readers in a different situation in order to get them thinking about your topic in a new way. If you have a personal connection to the topic, you might use an anecdote or story to get your readers emotionally involved. For example, if you were writing a paper about drunk drivers, you might begin with a compelling writing story about someone whose life was forever altered by a drunk driver: At eighteen, michelle had a lifetime of promise in front of her. Attending college on a track scholarship, she was earning good grades and making lots of friends. Then one night her life was forever altered.
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Write an introduction that interests the reader and effectively outlines your arguments. Every essay or assignment you umum write must begin with an introduction. It might be helpful to think of the introduction as an inverted pyramid. In such a pyramid, you begin by presenting a broad introduction to the topic and end by making a more focused point about that topic in your thesis statement. The introduction has three essential parts, each of which serves a particular purpose. The first part is the attention-grabber. You need to interest your reader in your topic so that they will want to continue reading. You also want to do that in a way that is fresh and original.